


Requiem On Segonax

by DBC_82



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (1963)
Genre: Aftermath, Classic Doctor Who References, Classic Who Companions Are Awesome, Closure, Clowns, Gen, Remorse, Serial: s151 The Greatest Show in the Galaxy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-18 04:41:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28737423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DBC_82/pseuds/DBC_82
Summary: The Greatest Show In The Galaxy Coda: The Doctor and Ace have escaped the Psychic Circus but lost the TARDIS. They take a moment to collect their thoughts and mourn what's passed, without realising they've unfinished business on Segonax
Relationships: Seventh Doctor & Ace McShane
Kudos: 1





	Requiem On Segonax

'I'm sure it's just over this hill.'  
So where's the lake?' said Ace, sat crosslegged on the ground, tipping the dust out of her upturned Doc Martens.  
'What?'  
'The TARDIS landed by a lake!'  
'Well it must be nearby!'  
She planted her boots on the ground in front of her, 'Is this another cartographical anomaly perhaps?'  
The Doctor bristled, 'The problem can hardly be said to be cartographical when to my knowledge neither of us is in possession of a map.'  
'Professor this is no time to argue about semantics. Admit it, we're lost.'  
He sighed and sat down next to her, 'Yes, I think you might be right.'  
Wiping the sweat from her eyes she searched the unbroken panorama of sand dunes and distant mountains for the dependable blue solidity of the strange box that she'd come to think of as home. She squinted against the blazing sun but all she could see was the faint shimmer of heat above the horizon. What I wouldn't give for a cool glass of lemonade she thought, or better still a pint.  
The hours before they came to find themselves sat in the dust contemplating the absence of the TARDIS had been uneventful compared to those that came before. They'd set off together arm in arm along the dirt track that lead away from the Psychic Circus leaving Kingpin and Mags eagerly discussing their plans for the future, excited and hopeful despite their losses and the ruins they'd left behind.  
Ace glanced sideways at her friend as they walked and wondered what he knew of this particular future. Once upon a time she would have asked him whether Mags and Kingpin would make a go of it or not but she was starting to suspect that he liked not knowing. Maybe that's why we always seem to leave in such a hurry, either slipping off unnoticed or exchanging a couple of rushed farewells. She liked to think that maybe they weren't always running to their next adventure, maybe they were running away from the present to give those few survivors they left behind a chance of happiness. He'd once told her that time could be rewritten unless it couldn't and that only he could tell the difference and at the time she'd thought it was a lot of responsibility for a small Time Lord to carry on his shoulders.  
Perhaps if the future was still unknown then maybe it wasn't written yet? That or maybe the Professor just really hated goodbyes  
As they wound their way up the dusty road she risked a glance over her shoulder at the smouldering remains of the circus tent and thought again about all the horrors they'd encountered there. With a start she saw the clown's face again, screaming silently in agony as Ace had gunned him down. For a moment she could still feel the cold plastic of the control box in her hands as she'd stabbed her finger down on the button. She flinched and shook her head to clear the image, telling herself again that she'd had no other choice.  
Casting her eyes about desperately for a distraction she noticed the stallkeeper they'd encountered earlier, ambling down the road toward them. Ace's stomach turned involuntarily at the memory of the rancid fruit she'd been forced to eat. The stallkeeper was eyeing them suspiciously and muttered something to her somewhat knackered looking horse who was still trotting faithfully along behind her.  
'Do we still need to be nice to her Professor?' she asked in a whisper as the woman drew level.  
'Of course not, the woman talks to her horse.'  
The Doctor doffed his hat regardless and the woman sniffed at them as they passed, while her horse shied and whinnied.  
The woman retreated into the distance behind them and Ace wondered what they looked to like to her, the two oddly dressed strangers who'd turned up and brought chaos with them. Feeling her thoughts returning to the same dark places she seized on the Doctor as a welcome distraction.  
'So are you going to explain exactly what happened back there or do I need to start juggling to get your attention?'  
'I'd beg you not to.'  
'Oh go on,' she said with a forced smile, 'You know how much you enjoy a protracted explanation.'  
For the rest of their journey they shared notes on their experiences ever since the small piece of robotic junk mail had invaded the TARDIS and set them on their dark path to the Psychic Circus. Once satisfied with his account Ace had nodded and they settled into a companionable silence that had lasted until it became apparent that the TARDIS wasn't where the Doctor thought it was. After acknowledging their predicament the Doctor had announced that they should pause to get their bearings and she decided to put on her sunglasses, fold her bomber jacket into a pillow and embrace the opportunity to lay back in the sand and try to put their experiences on Segonax behind her. For the first time in hours she wasn't being hunted by killer Clowns or attacked by robot Bus Conductors, all part of the Doctor's machinations of course. It was starting to become obvious that none of their random travels were ever really random but despite the ever present danger it was still better than life back in Perivale.  
She squinted at the Time Lord as he sat in the sand emptying out his capacious pockets. Life with the Doctor was so all encompassing that it wasn't very often that she thought of the life she'd left behind, the world of O-Levels, baked beans and Eastenders. Was she happier now than she'd been back then? Back when she'd been plain old Dorothy McShane and she spent her days bunking off school and her weekends exploring the abandoned old industrial wastelands of West London in search of something better to do. They'd had some laughs though, starting fires and breaking into places with Shreela, Midge and the gang.  
And Manisha of course. Always Manisha.  
She smiled at the memories even as she felt the same old pain but decided to put them away again. Too much time spent looking backwards meant you don't spot danger until it's right in front of you.  
Yes, she decided, as closed her eyes and relaxed in the warmth of an alien sun, life with the Doctor could be dangerous but it was definitely better.  
But it wasn't Manisha or the Doctor she thought of as she drifted into an uneasy asleep, it was the clown.  


******

Ace awoke with a start from a nightmare about robot hands closing around her throat and sat suddenly upright, her hands grasping urgently at the sand around her. She took a deep breath and reorientated herself; the Doctor was sat next to her was either entirely oblivious or pretending not to have noticed. He'd removed his socks and shoes and was happily burrowing his toes into the sand. Despite the lack of TARDIS there was no immediate danger, nor was there anywhere else they needed to be in the universe. As she waited for her breathing to slow down again she peered into the sky in an attempt to discern how long she'd been asleep for. As far as Ace could tell it had been mid-afternoon when they'd set off, though Segonax seemed perpetually tilted toward whatever nameless ringed giant it orbited she was pretty sure the position of the sun had changed.  
Once she'd calmed herself she decided to continue her earlier conversation with the Doctor in the hope of getting some real answers while he was distracted.  
'You know earlier when I said it was your show all along?'  
'Yes...?'  
Ace thought carefully before asking her next question.  
'Did you know all this was going to happen?'  
He looked affronted. 'Of course not!'  
'Oh come on Professor! I tell you I'm scared of clowns and the next minute we've rocked up at an evil circus... It just seems like a bit of a coincidence if you ask me.'  
The Time Lord harrumphed and adjusted his hat. Ace smiled, her arms still crossed behind her head as she peered at him from under her sunglasses. He was now busy constructing an elaborate sandcastle in front of him.  
'You told me on the long walk to where the TARDIS wasn't about how you defeated the Gods of Götterdämmerung-' she persisted.  
'Ragnarok,' he said, 'but same mythology.'  
'And that they were some sort of evil from the dawn of time?'  
'They were evil in it's purest form, torturing sentient individuals for their own amusement for millennia. I've spent a thousand years searching for a means of ingress to their Dark Circus.'  
'How did they get here?'  
'They never really were here, the planet Segonax just acted as a conduit to the dimension in which they were contained.'  
'Is that why they wanted entertainment, because they were trapped? That's pretty monstrous right?'  
The Doctor stopped building his sandcastle and frowned into the distance. 'To put it another way... I've fought evil in all its different forms in my many years as a traveller. I've doffed my hat at the Dalek Emporer and I've sat down for tea with meglomaniacs and monsters alike. I've routed the Autons and outwitted the Great Intelligence and throughout it all I've been looking for the evil that hides behind the curtain. That's what the Gods of Ragnarok are, a yawning chasm of need that only knew how to be sated and death the only currency they understood.'  
'Are or were?' she asked.  
'Both!'  
'How can they be both?' Ace countered.  
'Evil can only ever be kept at bay, diminshed but not destroyed entirely. For every Dalek you defeat with a baseball bat there's a platoon waiting in the wings. The Gods of Ragnarok will still exist in some form, somewhere and they will undoubtedly manifest again, despite our attempts here today. The circus will begin again and the cycle of pain and torment will claim another world and countless more lives.'  
She frowned, 'So why bother? If we're never really going to succeed, what's the point?'  
'Life is so fleeting and so precious,' he said as he scooped up a handful of sand and let it slip slowly through his fingers to be carried away by the breeze. 'It strives and it thrives and it will always find a way but it's also such a simple thing to end it. That's what evil does, it removes life, collapses the probabilities that make a person so precious. You are not just alive, you're an opportunity waiting to happen. To feed off of that is... abhorent. It must be fought.' He paused, 'And at any rate, though evil can never truly be defeated neither can the forces of good ever be completely stopped or silenced.'  
'Like us' she said brightly.  
'Yes, I suppose so.'  
He stopped speaking and Ace slipped the sunglasses from off her nose and back into her jacket pocket. The Doctor had abandoned his half-completed sandcastle and looked to be brooding again and she realised they'd probably never find the TARDIS if he slipped into an existential funk.  
'Professor?'' she said eventually.  
'Yes?'  
'Why is it we always end up talking about evil?'  
The Doctor laughed unexpectedly, a childish, joyful sound that made Ace smile.  
'Occupational hazard,' he said eventually.  
They watched the horizon together for a while in silence, it was late in the day but the sun somehow still lingering above the horizon. The Doctor started rummaging around in his inside pockets.  
'Hungry?' he asked.  
'I'm still trying to get the taste of that fruit out of my mouth,' she said, despite the rumbling in her stomach.  
He nodded and produced two cornettos from somewhere within what she was beginning to suspect were the dimensionally transcendental confines of his jacket. He handed a cone to her, the ice cream was still freezer cold and the packaging damp with condensation.  
'What about you Ace?'  
'What do you mean?' she said, around a mouthful of ice cream.  
'Are you still scared of clowns?'  
She stopped eating. 'Well I'm not sure getting chased by murderous robotic versions did much to alleviate my phobia now you mention it.'  
'They weren't all robots. There was the Chief Clown as well, another soul I failed to save.'  
Yeah, from me, she thought sadly.  
'I wonder who he was and on what distant star he'd been born. Had he ever known happiness? Had he ever experienced the simple joy of sitting in the sand with a friend and eating an ice cream?'  
'Professor, he tried to kill us. Repeatedly!'  
'Ace, you know better than to judge people based on their decisions in a time of crisis!'  
Digging her heels into the sand she thought about the Clown who'd embodied all her childhood fears and how he'd stalked her through the desert and forced her to confront her nightmares. She could still see his face when she closed her eyes and she shuddered involuntarily at the thought of it. It was becoming far too easy to just react in the moment, find the solution without thinking about the cost.  
When did I turn into a killer? she thought to herself.  
'It wasn't your fault,' the Doctor said finally and she closed her eyes, half pleased and half ashamed that once again he knew exactly what she was thinking.  
'How did you know?'  
'I always know,' he said, 'Just as I know it wasn't your fault.'  
'Pretty sure I knew what I was doing when I pulled the trigger thanks,' she said flatly.  
'Don't we all? Doesn't make the aftermath any easier to bear.'  
'I keep seeing his face, it's like I can't stop reliving it.' After a minute's thought she looked up toward the setting sun and smiled sadly. 'To answer your question... No, I'm not afraid of clowns any more.'  
'Good.'  
'Is it? What if its me that I'm afraid of instead? What if I'd been carrying some Nitro-9, eh? What then!?  
The Doctor leaned over and put a hand on her shoulder but said nothing.  
'I never even knew his name,' she said haltingly, and brushed away a tear.  
The Doctor gazed into the middle distance and said nothing. After a moment he turned to her, cupping her chin in his hand and smiling. 'Sometimes we never do learn their names, though there's absolutely no shame in mourning one's enemies.' He regarded her for a minute and seemed to make a decision. 'It's not an easy thing to face one's fears, neither is it a simple task to take responsibility for one's actions. You did what you had to do and accomplished both.'  
'Thank you,' she said.  
They looked at each other for a long time while around them the sun set.  


******

It was only after they'd finished their ice creams and the twilight had turned the sky a brilliant shade of violet that the Doctor stood up and announced he knew where the TARDIS was after all. Ace brushed the sand from her skirt as she hauled herself to her feet. In the wake of the sunset the air around them was suddenly alive with the drone and flare of firefly-like insects and in the distance she could hear the sound of keening animals waking up after a day spent under the hot sun.  
The Doctor whistled as they walked, occasionally poking the undergrowth with the tip of his umbrella and exclaiming excitedly and she secretly suspected that he'd known where the TARDIS had been all along and had only pretended otherwise just to give her the time to come to terms with her guilt. He was good like that, not that he'd ever admit it. If she were to ask he'd make up something that sounded convincing but there'd be no mistaking the twinkle in his eye.  
'Did you know,' the Doctor said as they walked, 'the first clowns on Earth were part of the court of the Fifth Egyptian Dynasty and held a similar role to priests.'  
'Is that so.'  
'And in Native American culture the figure of the Trickster channels the spirit-'  
Ace laughed, 'Professor, is there anything you don't know something about?'  
The Doctor pondered her question momentarily. 'Synchronised swimming,' he said finally, 'It's a complete mystery.'  
As they staggered up a sand dune clutching each other for support Ace finally sighted the familiar blue shape of the TARDIS ahead of them and laughed with delight. It was only as they got closer that she noticed the shape of a figure slumped against it unmoving  
'Professor look!'  
'I know.'  
'Who do you think it is?'  
'The Chief Clown,' he said gravely.  
Ace stopped walking. 'How did he even get here?'  
The Doctor knelt down and ran his hand through the sand. 'I'd wager from the tracks in the sand and the state of his clothes that he crawled here.'  
'Did you know we were going to find him?' she asked.  
'No.'  
As they moved closer she couldn't take her eyes from the prone figure before her while the Doctor stood by impassively, clasping the handle of his umbrella. She took a couple of tentative steps forward before he waved her back with an outstretched hand.  
'Be careful, he could still be dangerous.'  
He knelt quickly and felt for a pulse as Ace just stood and stared.  
'I don't think he's breathing Professor.'  
The twisted shape of the Chief Clown opened his eyes to look directly up at her and draw a ragged breath.  
'It's you,' he said through shaking, racking coughs. 'You... killed me.'  
'I'm sorry.'  
The Doctor knelt and took one of the clown's hands in his own as Ace stared down into bloodshot eyes of her tormentor. He'd lost his hat at some point during his crawl through the desert and his dark hair was plastered to the smudged remains of his white face paint with sweat and dirt. His outfit was ripped in several places and she could see blood stains in the shiny silver fabric from where he'd been hit by the bolts of energy fired by the robot that she'd controlled.  
'Doctor, can't we do something?'  
The Time Lord felt for a pulse and pressed his hands gently on the clown's chest before turning to her and slowly shaking his head. The clown's eyes rolled in his head as though he could see past the two travellers in front of him and through the dimming skies of Seganox into history.  
'It was never supposed to have... been like this,' he whispered. 'When we began... the sound of laughter would bring tears to your eyes. There was so much... joy. On Othrys we were happy but we decided to travel on. We lost our way... '  
The Doctor held the clown's hand tightly but said nothing. After a moment Ace knelt down as well and took his other hand in her own. The clean white gloves that he'd worn earlier were gone as well and his hands felt rough and calloused but cool in her own.  
'What happened on Segonax?' the Doctor asked urgently, 'How did the circus come to be here?'  
'We were drawn here... against our will.'  
'How? Tell me and I can use the information to keep fighting them! Please...'  
Ace leaned in closely and she struggled to hear the clown's words.  
'The Gods came to us., we couldn't stop them... could only obey,' he rasped. Another bout of coughing seized him and his eyes lost ther focus. 'The sound of laughter, in the old days... Children's laughter. It was such a delight. I think... It's the sound of laughter, that I'll remember now.'  
Ace looked at the Doctor who was staring down at the clown impassively, his mouth set and his eyes cold. She could tell from the clown's rasping coughs that his strength was failing. Despite everything he'd done Ace felt a rush of empathy for the broken figure in front of her, to die so far away from home on an alien planet seemed suddenly so unfair, she thought bitterly.  
'What's your name?' she asked feeling the sting of tears in her eyes.  
The clown smiled sadly but said nothing and then he closed his eyes and his breathing grew shallow. They continued to sit holding his hand long after the sun had set until eventually he died, alone and unregarded but for the two weary travellers, knelt in the dust beside a battered old blue Police box.


End file.
